Tom Coughlin Withdraws From Eagles Head Coaching Vacancy, Crisis Averted

So I wasted my morning meticulously cutting and pasting various members of the thought-to-be 2016 Eagles-Giants rivalry onto various Star Wars characters faces.  It’s okay, I honed my cut and paste skills on an iPhone.  

Moments after this news broke, Chip Kelly got hired as the 49ers head coach.  Must suck to be an Eagles fan right now.  Andy Reid may just walk into Foxborough and beat the Patriots, Chip Kelly has another job, the guy who I think was the most qualified for the Eagles job bowed out, and now they are stuck with…Doug Pederson? Yikes. I’ll take my uncle look-alike Ben McAdoo any ole’ day of the week. 
Things weren’t looking too hot for me this morning.  TC going to Philly would have had massive cataclysmic implications in my word had it been true. Would I learn to hate a man I loved so dearly? Should Chris Snee be completely omitted from the Giants ring of honor? Would Eli cry every time him and Coughlin were on opposite sidelines? Questions like this bounced around in my mind. Thankfully they were all answered with a resounding “No.” Like I said, threat neutralized, almost had to do something that may have made me into a felon. Sort of thankful instead this is the scenario

PS- Coughlin would have been so good for the Eagles. I’m doing cart wheels in celebration of the non-hire.


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